Brian Thayer

Here are two new books that I am very excited about.
Check them out for yourself or as a great holiday gift.

Early Monday afternoon I was out and about running errands. I was heading home from the post office near the main intersection here in downtown Northampton, when an acquaintance ran across the street shouting my name. He is a very well known and respected bodyworker here in town. We met once a few years ago to get to know a little bit about each others’ work. Since then we have brief conversations about work when we run into each other.

When he caught up to me on the street he said, “I’m glad I ran into you, I have a question for you.” And he reached for his bag, unzipped it and reached inside. I, for a brief moment thought, ‘Wow. He’s going to ask my advice/opinion about something; Or show me something related to our common interest in bodywork.’ I had a moment of feeling proud and respected that he was going to ask ME something.

I stared down at the bag he was reaching into, wondering what interesting information he was going to show me and ask me about. How quickly these feelings come and go …

Out of his bag he pulled an empty supplement bottle asking, “Do you guys sell these at Cornucopia?” And with that, my heart broke a little and my ego deflated.

For those who don’t know, I have worked at Cornucopia for just over 1.5 years. It is a part time job that I got after my husband and I separated so I could have some extra money to help me adjust to my new single income life. I work primarily in the vitamins, supplements and body care section of the store. It is a job that I really do enjoy and I have learned so much over the past 19 months. But first and foremost, I consider myself a CranioSacral Therapist.

So, in that brief moment on the street I began to question my career identity in this town. It got me thinking over the past few days about what I am doing to build my practice and my reputation as a CranioSacral Therapist. I don’t in any way mind that people know me and associate me with my work at Cornucopia, but I want that to be second to them knowing me as a bodyworker.

I’ve been in practice for just over 7 years in Northampton. I am very grateful for the clients I have. But in a city with over 200 bodyworkers, it has been challenging to build a private practice and become a recognized name. I will say that I am fairly well known within the CranioSacral Therapy community, and I am very thankful for that fact. The struggle is getting more potential clients to know about me and my work.

The positive outcome of this interaction is that it has got me thinking about my marketing, my business plan, my goals, and my dreams. I’m very happy at Cornucopia and thankful for the income support it provides. I’m fortunate to have a second job that I enjoy and don’t dread going to because I have to make money. But on some level it has led me to a place of complacency and because of this I have neglected my passion: my work.

I am good at what I do … you can ask clients and colleagues and they will tell you the same. I now know that I must focus more on getting out there and getting known in the community. I have been brainstorming and have many ideas that I need to refine. I now must begin to take action.

I know that I will be successful. I know I can achieve my goals. I believe it is all possible.

Yesterday was a tough day, as I believe was evident in my posts. Lots of emotional ups and downs … some tears. But through it all, I didn’t fight it. I didn’t try to ‘snap out of it’ or make myself feel better. I allowed myself to be in it … to experience it all. I believe this is a very important part of the process of loss that I learned from my brother during my separation from “J”. If I need to cry … cry. If I need to get angry … get angry. Whatever it is, don’t hold it back or stuff it down. In the long run that doesn’t do any good.

(Side bar … As I finished typing that last sentence, I looked out the window to see a monarch butterfly right outside my screen. It landed on the window ledge just long enough for me to admire its beauty and smile. A gift from the universe. Perhaps a gentle reminder that this life is filled with so many wonderful, beautiful moments. They are always there if you just take a moment to stop and look. Thank you.)

This allowing of one’s self to process feelings and emotions has a significant cross over into my work with CranioSacral Therapy (CST). In CST we work with what are know as Energy Cysts. These are physical, palpable energetic disruptions in the body caused by trauma. The trauma can be physical, mental, emotional or spiritual and can be of any severity. Whether or not the body ‘holds on’ to a trauma, creating an energy cyst, depends on many factors (I won’t go into all of them at this time). An energy cyst can be created if your body can not process the trauma at that time. So the body protects us by ‘walling off’ the trauma and putting it aside to deal with later, at a time when we have all the faculties to process and release it fully.

This is a greatly simplified explanation, so I hope you are getting the gist.

What happens is that these energetic disruptions that the body is holding on to, waiting to process, can begin to cause changes to the tissues of the body. These changes over time can become chronic health issues. That can be trouble from just one energy cyst. The fact is that most of us have not one or two, but many of varying severity. All waiting to be processed to allow the body to return to homeostasis. (Again, greatly simplified.)

So my belief is that by allowing myself to really be in it, feel it, allow it to happen and not shove it down, I am processing the emotions (or energy) as they are occurring. By doing this I am preventing the need for my body to hold on to any of it to have to return a later time. It may not feel great at the time, but it is very healthy.

Yesterday was a tough day. But today seems that much easier because I allowed myself to process so much. I’m sure there is more to come … more stuff will come up. And I feel confident that when it does I will recognize it, spend some time with it, and allow it to pass. It might not be easy, but it sure beats ill health or dealing with it again later.

I hope you think about this the next time and event occurs that shakes you up a bit; and I hope you spend a little time allowing yourself to be in it.